2016/17, Episode 22 - Robinson vs Balliol

If you haven't already you can watch the episode here before reading this post:

Both of these teams arrive in the second round with hearty victories under their belt. Robinson avenged a decade old defeat against Wadham, Oxford, while Balliol secured the highest winning margin of the round against Imperial, smashing the frankly tepid Londoners 220-55.

In their opening match Balliol captain Joey Goldman dazzled the internet with his shirt, emblazoned as it was with a pack of frolicking puppies. And his attirical nonchalance translated into a relaxed atmosphere amongst his teammates,  with the four of them having a jolly old time as they romped over the charred carcasses of the opponents they’d just roasted.

Tonight there was no such frivolity when it came to their outfits. Just as the competitive nature of UC becomes more serious at this stage, so to had they. No animal-based fabrical fun for them this week. Goldman simply requested £10 from each of the other three and purchased a four pack of blue-grey shirts from H&M. The Age of Mischief was over.

As many of you will already know, University Challenge is not the only method for the bulging brained to play out their quizzical fantasies through the medium of student on student competition. There exists as well the grimy world of Student Quizbowl, in which masochistic intellectuals subject themselves to ten consecutive quizzes in the UC format, but with even more difficult questions.

I can hear your incredulous murmurings, and until a few months ago I would have shared in your scoffing. But having attended an event earlier this year and buzzed in correctly for only two of 220 starters I can attest to their gladiatorial nature. If you don’t know enough, you get eaten by lions, its that simple.

Among my opponents that day were two of tonights contestants, Balliol’s Potts and Goldman. I recently came across a poll of Quizbowl regulars, who were each asked to rank the top twenty five players currently active in the country. Of fifteen respondents, fourteen ranked Joey Goldman as number one. The other? Second. (http://www.hsquizbowl.org/forums/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=18656). How could Robinson hope to live with such a leviathan, especially now no focus was being distracted by semi-kitsch clothing choices?

The short answer? They could not. The long answer? Goldman and his cronies showed no mercy as they ruthlessly picked apart the opposition for the second match running. The even longer answer? You can find it in the form of a detailed extrapolation of the TV show you’ve probably already watched, below.

Goldman took the first starter question, because of course he did. It would have been fairly useless of him not to after I’d just rambled away about how he’s the best quizzer in the land. Robinson snuck the next starter, but couldn’t convert a single bonus, and were already 95 points behind before they had a chance to get another.

The first picture round was one of those where I thought it was stupidly difficult, but also that Balliol would probably be able to clean up on - naming three composers from the titles of their works in the original languages. Complete nonsense to me, but bread and butter perhaps for a team who had been throwing the word ‘Szyzgy’ around earlier in the contest with such gusto. Turns out I was wrong, and while they struggled with more elegance than I did, they still struggled.

Some team captains, if they’re confident of an answer, will inform Paxman without any conferring with their teammates. Goldman took this to another level this evening, passing on one of these picture questions with no consultation within a few seconds of it appearing, so sure was he that none of his colleagues was going to get it. Not that the five points were going to be vital in the end.

He also wasn’t up for dealing with any of Paxman’s patronisation, quipping back at Jez after he’d ridiculed an answer of Laurence Olivier, and giving him the sassy double thumbs up made famous in the ‘Ooh, Friend!’ episode of the Inbetweeners when the correct answer was read out.

Robinson’s Pinder and Hodge battled on bravely, claiming three starters apiece, but as that was the same amount Goldman managed on his own they never really stood a chance.

Final Score: Robinson 90 - 210 Balliol

Another impressive demolition from Balliol, who look tough to beat going into the quarters, and commiserations to Robinson. This actually was the last episode before the Christmas series, which I will *try* to review too. No promises though. Thanks for reading