National Novel Writing Month

For the fourth or possibly fifth time in my life, I am attempting to write a novel in the month of November. I first did it when I was seventeen, abandoning my study of Advanced Higher Maths to write my debut masterwork. I've tried and failed a few times since, and succeeded another, in the lockdown of 2020.

This time I'm sort of cheating, and am going to include the words written in articles like this one as counting towards my total. Its definitely cheating actually. You're supposed to write 1667 words a day towards one single work, with the aim of completing a 50,000 word draft by the end of the month. Oh, its for a thing called National Novel Writing Month, by the way (NaNoWriMo, to those in the know) - I haven't just created an arbitrary challenge for myself and then broken my own arbitrary rules.

I think that I've tried this exact tactic before, and I may have opened a blog with a similar explanation of my indiscretions, but even if I have, this all goes towards the word count meaning it's going to be left in.

So instead of doing all 1667 words as part of a novel, I'm going to try and mix things up, with 800 odd words of the book and 800 odd words of random thoughts like this. And if you wonder why I'm using five words where one would do (apart from the fact that this level of verbosity is part of my axiomatic vernacular), then just know I'm doing it to increase the scale of my verbiage.

Earlier this evening I wrote two pages of the novel by hand (which is one third of the quota, because my handwriting is roughly 280 words/page), so I only have to write 1200 words in this blog. That's slightly more than usual, which, as I've said, is why you'll find the odd extra paragraph lying around where you wouldn't normally see one.

But I think I've pushed you far enough in that regard, so I'll get onto the episode now, shall I?

This was the first match of the second round, between Trinity, who made it through the play-offs against Southampton, having been beaten on a tiebreaker by Manchester in the opening match of the series, and Warwick, who ousted Wolfson in one of the five first round matches which exceeded 400 combined points.

To get to 50,000 words when I was seventeen, I had to resort to filling an entire page with the word far - to signify just how far something was away. I think there was also a page full of greats, to indicate a long-deceased ancestor of one of my characters. With my natural loquaciousness at twenty eight (which could perhaps be curbed in favour of a more considered concision, a la Hemingway) resulting in a fifty word 'Previously On...' section, I think I'm going to be fine without such repetitive indulgences.

Not to mention the fifty I got there recounting what happened in the previous fifty. Right, I really do need to stop that. Sorry. Here's your first starter for ten (if anyone is still reading...)

If you want to watch the episode before reading the rest of the review you can do so here (and yes, before you ask, these do count towards the total).

The first starter goes to Warwick's Coe, who can't believe his luck at hearing a description of the Fisher-Tropsch process (which is a collection of chemical reactions that converts a mixture of carbon monoxide and hydrogen, known as syngas, into liquid hydrocarbons. Copy-pasted Wikipedia sentences shouldn't really count, but I'm going to count it).

Warwick got two bonuses on robots before Jaksina hit back for Trinity with Argentina. They managed one bonus from a set on novelists with a last minute hail mary of Virginia Woolf. One of those 'always worth a guess' answers on University Challenge. Jaksina got his second starter in a row and Trinity took the lead.

Kang is frustrated because he was unable to get a question on Hawkeye, which he had watched. But fair play to him, because it wasn't very good, so he can be forgiven for forgetting things about it.

No one recognises the Irish sunburst flag for the picture starter, but Henderson wins Trinity the bonuses with Mansfield Park on the replacement ten pointer. Bannerjee continues the Cambridge streak with argonauts, and beams at his correctness.

A full set of bonuses is followed by Henderson's second starter, as Trinity begin to turn the screw.

Bliss hits back for Warwick with simulacrum, but the music starter goes to Henderson again as the Avonsiders are unable to establish a foothold. Kang beats Coe on the buzzer with renegade.

Everything is going Trinity's way at this point, but Warwick stay in the game thanks to Coe and Bliss. Still, they can't make any real inroads and Bannerjee stops them in their tracks again with Wolverhampton. Bonuses on chemistry see a mention for IUPAC (the international union of pure and applied chemistry), which, bizarrely, features heavily in the latest chapter of the novel I'm writing for NaNoWriMo.

Akarapongpisakdi wins Warwick the picture round, and cleans up on the bonuses which are all paintings featuring bears, then, for the third time, Bannerjee gets a timely starter for Trinity to halt their charge. With minutes left they are seventy clear.

Beresford makes this 60 with a quick starter, and they rattle through the bonuses in record time, saying pass instantly if they don't know. Rajan, too, is doing his best to keep the pace up, which he stated on Twitter was one of his goals for the end of matches.

Henderson grabs an important starter for Trinity with Warwick, but this time it doesn't knock back Warwick and they maintained their momentum. A monumental buzz of specific heat capacity from Coe brought them within 10 points with seconds remaining.

Stop me if you know it.

What word follows...

• Thread
• Soft-ball
• Hard-ball
• Firm-ball
• Hard ball
• Soft crack
• Hard crack

BUZZ

Warwick Akarapongpisakdi for the tie!

Caramelisation...

Wrong

Buzz, Trinity Kang, caramel?

Trinity 205-185 Warwick

Almost a stupendous comeback from Warwick there. So unlucky with the final answer too - I wonder how long the VAR had to deliberate over that. I know its not the word they were looking for, but she had the knowledge.

Trinity were very impressive too, and become the first side to reach the quarter finals. Good job all round.

If you made it past the woefully over-indugent introduction to reach this stage of the post, then I offer you my sincere congratulations and thanks.

And I will also take this opportunity to say that having made it this far you must be the kind of person who in some way enjoys this type of writing. If that's the case then you can sign up here so you never miss an episode - I promise that (after November) there won't be such brazen misuses of the English language in aid of hitting a word count (at least not until next November).